What Color is Abuse?

If mental abuse took on a physical characteristic what would be the color of the bruise? Would it turn green of envy? Red from lust. Is there a color for power? Yellow from the lack of self confidence that the abuser possesses. Would the bruise be placed on the physical body near the brain or near the heart? Would it not even turn colors until the victim becomes the abuser later in life?

If emotional abuse took on a physical characteristic what would be the color of the bruise? Would it turn blue as we have come to the agreement in this culture that ‘blue’ is the color of sadness. Would it turn red of the inner anger of the victim who can not seem to live freely under the thumb of other? White for the pureness of the ignorant.

Mental and emotional abuse is harder to prove for two reasons. First, because of the obvious – they are harder to see. Second, because the abuser and most of the time the victim do not realize that the abuse is actually happening. They can be covered up as can a bruise across the arm. Mental and emotional bruises are covered up with empty apologies and promises – it’s a ‘sorry’ followed up by a ‘but if you…’ then ended with a ‘I promise if…’. That’s the problem – there are too many ‘if’s’ in an abusers life. The abuser, weak in mental and emotional health but yet stronger in words are action, can based their prosecution contingent to the actions of the victim. Because this has been a virus of the living humans for decades it, to some, is not abuse at all but a way of surviving. To some, mental put-downs and emotional betrayal is quick-witted so much so that it almost goes under the radar and forgotten.

Of course, let’s not confuse simple heated arguments between two humans with under-the-belt statements over time to bring the opponent to their knees. Successful abusers can be hard to catch for they are not dumb people. They are very smart in fact – I am almost leaning to the concept that there is a connection. Emotional abuse is not successful with one blow – it is a process to which builds over time. Which leads to the truth than many victims do not realize their prison until the key is actually already gone. Mental abuse is more or less the same process. This process uses more sharp words, words that the abuser must know brings their opponent down. I say opponent because I am convinced that most abusers view their prey as a challenger – why else would they feel passionate enough to attack. This is where the circle starts. Abusers starts one of two ways. First, raised in a family where petite challenges mounted up and over time then adapted the culture of surviving. Second, the abuser was once a victim. Being first a victim one knows the tricks, the signs, the key to escape, the empty lines, the surviving methods when their next victim confidence is too large for the cage.