It's Over

There is a feeling of relief once it's all over. Not sure if the feeling falls under happiness or sadness but it is noted that the anticipation is gone, the endorphins are relaxed, the answers to the questions on the table, the scar is there and cells are gone. I am so thankful that my mom came this time - i wish she was here for my first one - but how was i to know the pain of the first procedure. More than anything i would love to be home with my family cuddling up with Vada (my black lab). Then, of course, everyone would go to sleep and i would meet my best for a glass of wine and an uncensored version of health issues in our mid 20's. We would laugh so hard the scars of our latest procedure would start to cramp. After a few episodes of Law and Order because we are tired of talking we would pass out just to realize we drank too much wine than we knew. But for now i am watching CSI and unsure if I'm trying to go to sleep or trying to wake up.